by Tom McLaughlin
 

THE DECKING OF  BIG 367

 

Comet receiver Gabe Aguilar accidentally levels News &  Record sportswriter Tucker McLaughlin to football action Monday Night as Comet fans look on      ( Images by Photoshop)

(Sung to the tune of “The Wreck of the Old ‘97,” with apologies to bluegrass fans everywhere)

One cloudless ev'nin I sat in the grandstands
Just watching the game down below,
Folks were cheering on their beloved Comets
Homecoming night my good fellow.

On the sideline was big 367
Taking in every play
All the cheerleaders and coaches take the side for 367
For he's got a deadline next day.

It was quite a scene at the stadium that night
The crowd leaning to the edge of the line
The Comets were movin', but Fleming was behoovin'
Their defense to stop a TD drive.

The QB barked to his mates in the huddle,
Saying, "Ignore those choppers ov'head
Them US Marines may be always faithful
But they ain't nothin' to what lies ahead.

He looked 'round the huddle and picked out a fellow,
Who would lead the Blues to paydirt
"Gabriel my man I'm calling your number
"We need some good yards to pick up a first.

"Run a quick hook in the flat on the left sideline,
"Be quick to get past the corner
"But if you go out of bounds stay clear of the biggun’
"Don't want to go away a mourner."

Gabe was flying down the field running 4.4 a'forty,
When his teammates began to bleat,
"Look up and catch the ball but pull up abornin'
"Dude on the sideline is 350 at least."

Did Gabe ever pull up? No, he never pulled up
Beyond the 35 yard line he flew,
Past players and coaches and by wood benches
What lay ahead he never quite knew.

Did he ever reel in? No, he never reeled in,
Oh that poor boy could be dead.
Oh, yonder went receiver and defender 
Lucky they hit belly not hard head. 

Ol' 367, he was the slickest writer
That the town had ever known,
But slow on his feet with Gabe barrellin' down 
Like a mighty hurricane jes' blown.

Now, Comet fans, you must take warning,